Random Posting

1. I woke up to see my baby and wife.

2. I was able to wake up and know that I have love in my life and caring people in my life.

3. I have three weeks of school left!

So, I am sitting in my Race and Minority relations class and I just feel the need to write down what I am feeling/what I am thinking. I feel a bit bored with school right now. It is getting close to the end of the semester, things are coming to a due date and I just feel no motivation to do any of it. I want to just take care of my baby girl and my wife. The more I think about school the more I stress. I know I need to get things done, but I just have no motivation to get it done.

I think I need a bit of relaxation time, but have no time to do such. Maybe I should just put my shoulder to the wheel and push along to get through this storm. Internal motivation is needs to push me. Although, it is hard to push yourself when you feel that you are out of gas. If I didn't have to work I think it would help me get things done for school, but then again, if I had more time to do nothing, I probably would be doing nothing anyway.

What I am going to do is just put my head down, bear this storm and get through it. I think I just stress too much about school and just need to relax from it, get it done and move on. Dwelling on the stress of school wont do anything for me. I can only do as well as I can, which can be very good. I need to surround myself with good influences of motivation and strength. My mother has great strength and determination. Jim has great motivation. My wife is a strong woman. Paul is a strong man and a motivation in my life to slow down and take things as they come at you. These people are great to me and I need to pay a closer eye to them.

Much love and smoochies.

Throwback!

1. I had breakfast this morning and it has made my day seem to fly by.

2. My sister is happy and I am happy because she is happy.

3. My wife is going to have our baby soon!

I am writing about a quote from Shakespeare today. The quote is quite famous, but oh well.

To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them?

So, the way that I view this quote is saying that we can either shrug off what people say to us or we can fight against what they say. It also asks which is better to do. I think that depending on what you are hearing from others or being told by the person straight to your face, that it requires a different approach. In our society if you tell someone that you don't like the way that they do something or if they do something that offends you, you do not tell the person that they offended you or what have you, you go to someone else and have that person go to the person that offended. Although, I think that we should have the testicular fortitude to go up to the person that did something to us and say something about it.

Where it says 'suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or take arms against a sea of troubles', the way I think of this is it is saying should I deal with all the painful/hurtful things coming at me or attack back at them with a full frontal assault? Is being able to shrug off all the bad things in your life the more noble and virtuous way of living or is turning to someone who has upset you and ripping their heads off and possibly installing a new asshole a good way to approach somethings? You tell me in a comment.

I am gonna be a father!

First Three:

1. I got a good amount of sleep last night and I feel good today.

2. My wife informed me that she could feel our babies head in her birthing path.

3. I am excited to be a father.

As the title states. I am gonna be a father. So, what quote about being a father do I have?

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman

he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold

This quote could not be more true. We see if every day in our lives. Fathers are wanting their little girls to grow up and be able to continue to grow and become women. But as soon as they are women and are saying things like, "Daddy, I want to marry this man. He is so wonderful." The father wants to take her back to being a baby again. I think that as the daughter grows, the father feels that she is moving too fast and it scares him. It seems as though when a child starts to grow up the parents want to control how they grow, even though they know that the child will grow up regardless.

What I plan to do with my child is watch their growth and keep things fairly open. I was raised this way and I think I have a fairly decent concept of life and am able to function properly enough. Although I think that children need to know what they are allowed to do and what they are not allowed to do, but also need to realize that I do not feel they must follow exactly what I have told them to do. I do not want a drone child, but I want a child to grow and flourish under my guidance.

The question I ask of my viewers, how do you raise or plan to raise your children? Or if your children are already grown, what did you do or what did you not do to help your children grow?

Bit of a change..

As with always, I will start with my three for the day:

1. I got to cuddle with my wife for a bit this morning. We didn't want to get out of bed because of it.

2. I started working out for at least 20 mins a day and feel great!

3. I have lost a pound a week for the last 8 weeks.

So, what I am wanting to start doing, along with my normal posts on occasion, I want to take a quote a day and write about it and how it applies to me or what I think about it. Today, being the 24th of February, I have chosen a quote from Braveheart.

Yes, I've heard. Kills men by the hundreds. And if HE were here,

he'd consume the English with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse.

This line has always been something that has stuck out to me. This is where William Wallace is talking to the army of Scotland and responding to the myths of his person. The thing that I think always stuck out to me was that even though all the people were saying that he was this or that, he never let it get to his head. He just did what we had set out to do originally. He wanted to free Scotland and so he didn't have time to let his legend overtake what he wanted to do.

I feel that people let themselves get caught up in things and forget about their goals. If someone is doing something because of their "legend" that they have built, they tend to not focus on the goal ahead of them and will have a harder time getting to their goals. If William Wallace would have given into his legend and been very prideful of that, would he have freed Scotland? Would he have had such a great following if he was proud of himself? I would argue that Scotland would still be controlled and not be able to be free.

I want to say that I do not give into the pride I have in myself, but I know that there are times that I give into it and lose track of my goal. I want to get back onto track with what I want. I want to be a great father, a provider for my family, a great husband and lover (not sexually speaking), and I want to get a great education. So, I am going to try to be less prideful and more humble.

Anyone else have this issue or any thoughts, feel free to comment.

Ich habe viel Freundin!

I will start with my three good things on the day:

1. I woke up to a wonderful song from my sister.

2. I got to kiss the most beautiful woman before leaving for the day.

3. A friend in my German class gave me the best information on raising children and doing school.

Something that I have finally realized today is that I have many friends that actually do care about me more than would be imagined. Many people, whom I consider friends, have been looking out for me and my family and giving advice or information. All of these people are making my life so much easier. The main people I know that have made my life much much easier right now are Jim and Cheri.

Jim and Cheri, for those of you who do not know them, are my step-dad and my mom. They have taken such great care of me and Melody. They have been a shoulder to cry on and helpers when we needed to get something that we couldn't quite afford and helping us build our crib for Mahayla. Jim and Cheri have been the biggest help to Melody and I. We appreciate them highly and love them with every part of our beings.

There are other people of mention here. I would like to mention my sister, Brianne, and my friend Paul. Brianne has been an every day enlightener. Bri sends me a song every day at 8:13 to 8:17, somewhere in there. I thoroughly enjoy this part of my day. Paul, on the other hand, is just a wonderful person. He has helped me through some tough times without even knowing he has helped. He has been a light in the darkness and helped me realize how great of a person I am. Between Melody and Paul I know I am a great person!

Between everyone that has been mentioned here, you are all wonderful people! I love everyone of you so much and am so thankful to have you in my life. I love being able to call my folks anytime I need to just talk and be able to talk with them and not have to hold my words back or my tears for that matter. Thank you so so much!

New Beginnings!

So, I have been communicating with my Bishop and everything I want to do will be done in June, or before that time! I am so incredibly excited. I have the ability to live all of my dreams and fulfill them and it makes me so happy.

My dear friend Paul wrote on his blog, http://paulsifer.blogspot.com/, that he wrote about thinking about the three things in your life daily that make your day better. I instantly thought of my wife, my family and my friends. I know without these people I would feel alone and depressed. I also know that in the case where I lost one of these people I would be devastated. I would feel that my life would be over and I would need to have the other groups around me to keep me going. I know that I would overcome this, but would want to not move on, as Thanatology tells us, it isn't about moving on, it is about learning to continue living without that person.

I know this is a small update, I will make a longer post in a day or so.

God loves everyone.. Even me!

So, if you didn't know I started going back to Church. LDS church that is. I decided to do this after a long night of no sleep and just deep thought. I started to think, "Wow, I am going to be a father. How hard will it be for Mel if she goes to church alone? What will my daughter think? What do I think on the subject? Can I move past my rebel phase and move into a more intelligent part of my life or am I going to be stuck bashing my head against a wall? Have I turned my back on God? Has he turned his back on me?" All of these questions ran through my mind making me want to just give up thinking about it. As the minutes turned into hours, I started to think about all the people in my life that I enjoyed spending time around, for the most part they were either LDS or lived a fairly LDS lifestyle. My mom, my step-dad, my sister, my wife, a few friends (specifically Paul, AJ, Rachel, Sarah, Josh, Amber, Sam and Kris) and most of the random acquaintances that I have. All of them either live very close an LDS lifestyle. But all of them have their own way of living it. I will not go into specifics, but for instance I have a hard time with my language and my drive to pray every day and read my scriptures. Does this mean that God loves me less or not at all because of this? Not at all. I have finally realized that God is my parent. And as my mother has always said "Parents are not your friends. We will not leave you if you do something stupid. We wont be happy with you but we will never stop loving you." This is the same for God. No matter what we do he will always love us. Even when you use drugs or drink alcohol, he may not be happy with you, but he loves you. So, I am passing this little bit of info that I found onto you guys!

With love and caring always,

Your Humble Narrator